Author Archives: Laura

About Laura

With five kids, one with special needs, a handsome son-in-law, a perfect grandchild (seriously, aren't ALL grandchildren perfect??), a even handsomer husband, my career as a NICU RN....what else would I be doing but juggling?

observing the busy nineties

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Mom, what were the 90′s like?

Well, I started working as an RN in the NICU in 1990. Your sister, Hollie, started school in the 90′s. Zoë was born in 1992, then Abby was born in 1993 and they also started school in the 90′s. And then Jodie was born in 1996.

WOW! Woman, you were busy!!

(laughing) Yeah, I guess I was a little bit busy in the 90′s.

Yes, he did refer to me as “woman”. Who is this child, this beautiful boy with the dilated pupils from his annual visit with his opthamologiist? Perhaps it’s the influence of the eye drops?

Oh son! My beautiful, wonderful son…what an adventure your preteens are becoming; an adventure with the promise of lots of questions and lots of thought and lots of laughter.

And to think I was a busy woman back in the busy nineties!

Oh, and who said boys were easier? Who?

overheard under the Big Top #616

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Just another day running errands with my favorite 11 year old boy last week including a stop at Target. Yes, it seems that I am there a lot. Perhaps that is why the Target lady is a little too familiar with me. While there, I ask Daniel if he has thought about anything he might like to give to his Dad for Father’s Day.

Well, there is this trophy I saw the last time we were here…I know it’s probably real expensive but I really think my Dad should have it.

Yeah, we HAD to buy it.

I have to say that he is indeed the best Dad, the best dad that I know. My kids and grandbabies are so lucky.

wait, there’s a window?

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Picking up a prescription at my local Target pharmacy I encounter one of our very own Target Ladies who waited on me.

Oh my goodness but your hair is SO LONG!

Has so much time passed that she hasn’t noticed that, yes, my hair is long? Perhaps I have been wearing it up too much. Well today it was down and it was long.

You look SO GOOD with long hair!!

Thanks.

You look so YOUNG wearing your hair like that! Like really young. Ten years younger, or more. Of course I know how old you are so I will have to say you look forty-one!

Well 41 is good. Thank you.

Walking away with my prescription I find myself laughing a little. Thanks to Overly Familiar Target Lady everyone waiting in line now knows how old I am…ten years older than 41. Not that I really care. It just struck me as funny, as pretty much every encounter I have with Overly Familiar Target Lady. So I overshare a little on Facebook…as we do.

Overly familiar Target Pharmacy lady says I look like 10 years younger with long hair. “Like 41 because I know how old you really are.” Okay!

To me it was funny and so I shared.

Soon enough comments followed and although I LOVED the compliments that wasn’t what I was going for. I swear. Still, it was nice. Thank you. But quickly enough, the air was let out of my ballooned head by a comment that perhaps there is a limit, a limit of when one is too old for long hair and perhaps that window was soon closing…for my friend…my friend who is ten years younger than me.

Seriously?

There is a time when long hair is no longer acceptable for women of a certain age…40-something year old women?!

In 2013?!

Why can’t middle-aged women have long hair?

Why indeed.

Yes, I know after a certain age our hair, among other things change. Believe me, I am aware. Often a woman of a certain age finds that her hair thins some. For me that would mean I don’t break as many hair brushes as I used to in my twenties and thirties. It still is very thick…and as I am getting older it is changing a little in texture, becoming coarser, curlier…and grayer. Hollie covers that gray very well now. Perhaps I might not let her cover it as much…then again, no…for now.

Anyone who has known me for a very long time knows I have worn my hair very long and very short and all kinds of lengths in between. That’s me. That’s my hair. So the long hair now is not me trying to look young or trying to grasp desperately after fading youth or beauty. No. It’s just me and my hair and I like it this way right now. I like it a lot. As long as the hair is healthy and looks good why must a woman wear her hair short just because she is of a certain age? My hairdresser agrees. Me as a 51 year old woman is a helluva lot more confident and comfortable in my own skin than I ever was in my teens (DUH!), my 20s, my 30s and even part of my 40s and right now I am very comfortable with my long locks. So for me, that window is open, open all the way baby letting the cool, fresh breezes in…hot flashes, you know.

I see her pointe shoes and I want to paint them black, a how-to guide

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Recital time is fast approaching for the dancing people here under the Big Top. We have (more) costumes which are not custom made (like the competition costumes) so some alterations might be needed on some.

Except for Jodie’s ballet costume. Oh the trials of being a hanger! We should suffer like that.

Right?

Actually I’m kind of relieved that I don’t have to do any alterations for hers. I have enough to do already.

Dance Mom problems.

Daniel’s pants for his Hip Hop number, Suit & Tie, need to be hemmed and taken in because his pants pretty much always need to be hemmed and taken in. Now why can’t dance costumes have adjustable waists?

WHY?!?!

Oh well, I will power through and get it done. But first, Jodie’s pretty pink Gaynor Minden pointe shoes need to be dyed black; because archers in the Hunger Games ballet wear black pointe shoes. Oh sure one could just buy black Gaynor Mindens. But they are a special order. Plus Jodie’s current pointe shoes are broken in and, in her words, perfect. So we must dye them black. I could take them to a cobbler and have it done for $30 or so. Or I could do it myself. How hard could it be? Her dance teachers tell me not hard at all. So do assorted how-to guides found on the Internet.

Yay Internets!

So, after a little research and discussion with other dance moms I was ready to get to work.

Yes, I found myself singing Paint It Black because I’m nerdy that way.

To start, first the shoes must be nice and dry. An afternoon out on the patio here in Manteca insures they are dry. Next make sure they are clean by wiping with a soft, dry cloth.

Now let’s paint these babies black! Supplies needed are:

  • a black Sharpie marker
  • Rit liquid dye
  • white vinegar for satin pointe shoes
  • newspaper
  • gloves, unless you want black hands
  • a sponge

First I took the Sharpie and colored all along the stitching and elaastic of the shoes because the dye doesn’t seem to take there.

I also used the marker on the soles of the shoes because Jodie thought it would look cool.

Definitely cool!

Next, stuff the shoes with newspaper or plastic bags. This helps to protect the inside of the shoes as well as makes it easier for you to dye the shoes.

Pour about half the bottle of Rit dye into a small bowl and add ½ cup of white vinegar to it. Stir to mix. Then dip your sponge into the dye. Squeeze off the excess. Start dabbing dye onto the shoe.

Yes, I wore white shorts while working with black dye. I’m pretty bad ass that way.

It’s important to wring out as much liquid from your sponge because excess liquid might cause the satin to shrink as it dries and possibly warp your shoe. Allow the shoes to dry completely after the first coat and repeat until the desired color is reached. Remember that you can always go darker, but it is impossible to remove color once it has been applied.

It is this moment that Bill walks by to admire my handiwork and tells that I used his favorite sponge. Um, sure honey.

Once you have achieved the desired color, allow the shoes to dry overnight. The next day touch up with the Sharpie, if necessary.

And now Jodie’s pointe shoes are black, sexy, bad ass and ready to dance on stage for recital.

where your freedom to choose hurts

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With no apology whatsoever, I am about to piss off a community of parents…the anti-vaxxers, and I don’t really care. Yes, of course you as the parent have the right to make an informed decision about the health and welfare of your child because you are the parent. I chose to breast feed. I chose to use cloth diapers. I chose to not circumcise. I chose to delay the start of kindergarten for two of my children and started another when she was 4 years old. All of these were decisions that my husband and I made as parents after careful thought and discussion…as parents do. And not one of these parenting decisions has affected the health and welfare of another person. Now a parent can choose to not vaccinate their children. That’s their choice. Unfortunately that choice can and often does affect the health and welfare of others around them…at their schools, playgroups, churches and random encounters with total strangers.

I’ve seen the consequences of this personal parenting choice too many times as an RN in the NICU. Nothing is more heartbreaking than watching a newborn infant fight for their life from a infectious childhood disease that can be totally preventable. It’s even more gut wrenching to be at that bedside with a grief-stricken parent who never would have imagined their thoughtful parenting choice would harm one of their own children, when they are the most vulnerable.

It’s sad.

It’s tragic.

But now it is personal.

Fallon has Rubella, also known as German measles. She has yet to have received her MMR vaccine because at her 15 month pedi visit, she was sick so the doctor suggested to wait until her 18 month visit which would have been right about now, now when she is sick. So where in the world could she have picked up this lovely virus? Given the incubation period and the fact that we know no one in Fallon’s circle who is sick with this we track back to that dance competition in Davis where anyone could have been unknowingly coughing and sneezing and talking and spreading little Rubella viruses everywhere. Not a big deal for the majority of the people there who were likely vaccinated against Rubella or, like me, had Rubella.

Your Rubella droplets can’t hurt us!

But what about an infant or young toddler who isn’t vaccinated? Or perhaps a woman who is pregnant? What about her vulnerable unborn baby?

Looking at my sweet grand baby covered in an uncomfortable rash and thinking about Hollie’s newly pregnant friend who was unwittingly exposed, I say your argument is invalid.