(almost) Everyone has at least one…one pair of perfect blue jeans. The pair that fits your shape perfectly in every way that you want it to. They are perfectly broken in. Perhaps they have been that way since Day 1 because you paid the extra coin for them in their perfect wearable destruction; or maybe they have been worn to perfection through the days, weeks, months and years that you have worn them. You slip them on and they hug every curve and edge exactly how you want them to. They are your old friend that you can dress up, dress down, grunge around in or just chill in.
Your favorite pair of jeans.
Your perfect pair of jeans.
Your most favorite, perfect pair of jeans.
Then today you slip them on and lo, they have become distressed and destroyed in such a way that is most certainly not fashionable, or repairable and…
Oh stop judging! I know you get it because I know you too have that pair of jeans and even if you don’t, it’s my blog and I’ll self-indulgently mourn for the jeans that I have worn perfectly for longer than my first grandbaby has been alive if I want to.
By the way, that grandbaby is 6½ years old and she STILL hasn’t lost any baby teeth.
Let us all now pause for a moment of silent meditation for the perfect pair of blue jeans lost.
I know. I’m sorry. It’s absolutely frightening how I look without makeup. Still I don’t care because…
I’m getting PAMPERED!!! As I should be. As I deserve to be.
And then Hollie says to me, “I just LOVE how you let me do whatever to your hair.“
I nod because it’s true. And then I catch a glimpse of…
OMG! Purple!! Purple like…
Sure it’s the IT color right now from fuschias to lavendars to deep purples to silver tones. It’s hot. Of course Hollie is fast becoming the go to person to get these luscious, colorful locks here in the Central Valley. But…dress codes…”natural hair color”…Absolutely I am a woman of a certain age who could wear the blueish-purplish-silvery hair and it would be totally legit…but, I don’t know.
“MOM! Stop peeking!!!”
I confess that now I am nervous but I keep repeating to myself how much she loves that I trust her…over and over until…
Signature copper with deep violet-red roots painted on as if baby I was born this way.
I may save tiny human beings but my girl makes me beautiful and that, based on the presented photographic evidence is truly miraculous.
There has been better days and good days and okay days and then there is a bad day…and I see this on my Facebook timeline.
OMG, yes! Sharks!!
Exogenous or endogenous…”Who the hell really cares?!”…that’s what my doctor said to me.
I like her.
I like her a lot.
I also respect the years and years of study she has spent always learning and trying to better understand the physiology of the brain. We are working hard together and, yes, there have been better days. There have been days with more positive energy and a lot less self flagellation.
Then comes a bad day and…
At least I’m working, working very hard, and I continue to go on.
The struggle is real.
But the work is good even if it is hard and sometimes even brutal.
Who knew that this non-swimmer could manage to swim a little, tread water and ride the surf a little?
But I am.
I just got to watch out for those damn sharks.
Thank you Adam for the perfect words on what wasn’t a very good day. It’s good to know I’m not riding those waves alone.
Found this today and all I can say is yes…hell yes.
I no longer have patience for certain things, not because I’ve become arrogant, but simply because I reached a point in my life where I do not want to waste more time with what displeases me or hurts me. I have no patience for cynicism, excessive criticism and demands of any nature. I lost the will to please those who do not like me, to love those who do not love me and to smile at those who do not want to smile at me. I no longer spend a single minute on those who lie or want to manipulate. I decided not to coexist anymore with pretense, hypocrisy, dishonesty and cheap praise. I do not tolerate selective erudition nor academic arrogance. I do not adjust either to popular gossiping. I hate conflict and comparisons. I believe in a world of opposites and that’s why I avoid people with rigid and inflexible personalities. In friendship I dislike the lack of loyalty and betrayal. I do not get along with those who do not know how to give a compliment or a word of encouragement. Exaggerations bore me and I have difficulty accepting those who do not like animals. And on top of everything I have no patience for anyone who does not deserve my patience. ~Jose Micard Teixeira
And now the hard part, to take those words and make them mine because…yeah.
Won’t lie, of late it has been wretchedly hard to maintain that 100% track record of mine. Thank goodness for the kind of people who do more than just offer the trite “let me know if I can help” bullshit then avoid you like the plague because that’s what happens with people in your circles when shit happens. It’s okay. I understand. I promise you that I’m not contagious.
Meanwhile, thank you Kari, Mike, Tori, Grace, Craig, Kim, Erika, Jenn and Brenda for little messages and reminders to hang in there. Thank you.
Thank you also my darling husband for just being patient and kind because more than anything that is what I need right now. Wait, I need hugs. I need lots of hugs. Thank you and thank goodness for Daniel and for Hollie sending Hazel and Fallon with hugs. Yeah, I know Hazel might be using these opportunities to get out of homework because 1st grade life is hard and Fallon is absolutely using the opportunity to get out of naps but those are mighty fine hugs and something to look forward to the next day, tomorrow, because yeah today is almost done.