no apologies for the cuteness

With holidays comes adorable Easter dresses.

Bonus if they are dressed alike because what can be more adorable…

…especially when the darlings are at an age where they can’t really complain and protest. Actually at this age they LOVE it! So seize it while you can.

It’s a very narrow window of time when you can truly get away with such cuteness…

…and enjoy the total cooperation; because it’s fun that we are all dressed the same!

Remember that when the day comes (and it WILL come) when the kids look at these memories and then back at you wondering out loud, “What the hell were you thinking, Mom?!

Then you smile back at them because you have no apologies for such cuteness and you are absolutely certain that someday they will do it to their children too.

Scroll back to the top if you don’t believe me.

slowing so the magic can happen

I could lie and tell you all that it’s been a stellar week in wife-dom and mommy-hood but some of you know me too well. I did shoot for excellence but the darling husband and some of those kids just got in the way , as they always do.

Adjusting continues with the resting and rehabilitation for Bill. And he pushes perhaps too hard. Naturally just when I start to nag or cry or fret or worry it is clear that his body is already nagging at him almost as good as I would. Still, I nag anyway because we both wouldn’t expect anything less from me and besides, he is pale and looking like he has done too much and OMG…why is he not following doctor’s orders??!!

Oh, he has no idea how much I am restraining myself…until one of my darling clowns does what apparently at that moment is the unthinkable. I mean, who is going to take your special-middle-aged-lady-face-cleanser from your shower without asking and then not even bother to return it?

Right?!

There is talk that I might have gone a little bit over the top handling this incident…after my darling husband told me he took the dog for a walk jog around the block…against doctor’s orders…but it was no big deal…except that it was clearly as I look at him. Yes, I might have transferred a little bit of that anxiety and stress on one of my clowns.

I offer no apology.

I blame the kid and the husband.

After we all took a deep cleansing breath, they did too.

Yes, we all are still adjusting.

It’s a good thing my darling husband made an appointment today for me to be pampered at our darling 1st daughter’s salon before the STEMI. I am guaranteed always anything hair related from Hollie gratis because I gave her life and all that but I know time in her chair, at her salon, is money that she works very hard for. Her time is limited and her client list is growing and growing to the point that people wait to sit in her chair. How, then I rationalize, can I sit in her chair taking time from paying clients? So I have her work her magic in her kitchen or mine while trying to juggle her busy, busy babies. Except Hollie and the darling husband decided that I can and I should so the appointment was made…and the appointment I kept.

I could get used to this.

We spent a few hours together. Her busily making me ginger-er (with a lot of purple) and trimming the latest pixie grow…which I have to say is the best of all my pixie grows ever thanks to Hollie’s talent and skills.

And we laughed.

We talked about the crazy tech-phobe moms in our school district and on Facebook.

And music.

And the young Justin Bieber hair stage of a pixie grow.

And Britney Spears’ weaves.

And Hunter Moore and the last time we talked about him and what a douche he was and hurray for karma!

And new adventures.

And her amazing babies.

And getting older and how she better never, ever talk to me like I’m two when I am super old even if my mind is addled because I’ll still know because back in the day in  nursing school, believe me, those beautiful old people knew their adult children were doing that to them.

I feel very strongly about that last discussion and made it very clear to her…,and perhaps someone in the chair next to me.

Oh, and I marveled to myself, what an amazing human this person who is a part of me is…the first human who is a living part of me!

And she makes me pretty and ginger-ed.

I leave her salon feeling lovely with my sexy, sexed-up hair that is even more almost a bob and I feel overwhelming love and pride for this adult baby girl of mine. I’d go back into her salon and hug her while gushing with pride and love and tears in front of co-workers and the client in her chair but that would be awkward and not right…not right at all.

She might never, ever let me sit in her chair again.

No, I’ll just enjoyed my sexed up hair, which the darling husband likes and random vet tech noticed and complimented when I dropped Zelda-kitty off for her appointment after…and I will give thanks for slowing down today so I can sit in my daughter’s chair for a few hours today and let the magic happen. Then I will smile because I know that magic happens because I’m her mommy.

humoring mom

Twas just 5 days before Christmas and perhaps a little hungover from a NICU cocktail party, tired from the Dance Stars Christmas Dance Recital and relieved after sending off that final gift and getting all the other gifts under The Big Top tree, I felt like celebrating because that is what the best holiday elves do.

How to celebrate?

Well, Kristen and LIz from Cool Mom Picks inspired me. #babythenandnow is absolutely a fun idea. Bonus is it takes little energy because other than doing laundry (my life), all I want to do the rest of today is relax because my work week, including Christmas Eve night promises to be busy. Oh, and then there is Christmas.

Of course the challenge is to get these circus clowns to do it because they are at work or playing in San Francisco or shopping or just super annoyed because we are twelve turning thirteen very, very soon. Yes, they are quite certain that I am crazy. Then there is my darling husband. Yeah, he definitely didn’t want any part of this silliness because he is sliding fast into get-off-my-lawn grumpy old man status.

Whatever, family. Just do it.

And so they do.

I love my babies! Then and now.

and the party starts all over again

She arrived at last,

and the party started all over again.

Just twenty eight years ago today, being fashionably four days late, she arrived at last. Yes, the party did start all over again…

and it goes on…

as the best parties often do.

Today my first born, quite possibly the most perfect 8lb 4oz girl child (second only to her own 8lb 4oz girl child), was born which means that yes, I am now the mother of a 28 year old woman!

This woman!

Desperately resisting the urge to shout, “I made dis!”

Oh, the struggle!

The struggle is real.

I could not be prouder of this bright, talented, wise, thoughtful, strong, gorgeous woman.

Oh, screw it!

I made this gorgeous human!

You are very welcome Universe! 

Happy birthday my amazing, wonderful Hollie~Bear.

 

photo dump: the thankful edition

It’s Thanksgiving Day so I’m going to give thanks, as one should on Thanksgiving Day…and every other day.

For Thing 1 and Thing 2, generously provided by my employer and a co-worker who has no use for the 12 pound turkey they handed him as we left work early in the morning last week. Yes, I named them, as I do every year. Deal with it! Meanwhile, Thing 1 and Thing 2 are currently soaking in an icy cold, brine-y bath waiting to be properly roasted.

For bringing sexy back in the way that only Personal Protective Equipment can. This look is hot. No. It really is hot.

The perfect pick-me-up after running 4 miles before you work your 4th 12 hour night shift in a week. Hurray for Snickers and for running and for a busy, busy full NICU which means work!

For kick-ass looking compression socks to wear after running a few miles before working hard on your feet for 12 hours all night long. Oh, and, give thanks for the break relief RN who makes the moment where you get to put your feet up for 20 minutes.

Be thankful for the 2 hour nap you had after working all night before you take the time to drive your favorite Princess 125 miles in the rain and wind and fog across a couple bridges during drive time Bay Area traffic so that she can attend two hours of Princess training.

It’s totally worth it when she sends you this picture of her being fitted for the wig of her favorite princess, one of a few who she will be portraying. Yes, you can almost hear her squeeing with delight from the only open cafe in the area where you sat and waited during those two hours. Worth it. Totally. So was her telling you how much she loved you and was glad you were driving as you drove across the Richmond-San Rafael Bridge in the 0.25 mile visibility fog.

This card with this name on it which we waited for for 12 years because no matter what the social workers tell you, it isn’t as easy as it should be to get your child’s social security card with his name on it after the adoption is finalized because government agencies can be so frustratingly dumb sometimes. But not Maria at the Manteca Social Security Administration office. Sure it took her several hours to figure a way around the bureaucratic walls but she did it because, as she humbly put it, “there’s always a way around walls.”

Remembering when you said you couldn’t wait for your kid to outgrow his shoes and clothes before they wear out when you see that the shoes that you just got him are too small. Human Growth Hormones, we are so thankful especially when you see your son’s height and weight plotted at <1%ile on the growth chart because look at that, the kid is almost finally plotting on the normal growth chart!

Pretty scarves and jewelry and makeup and clothes that flatter what your mama gave you, no matter what your age is, that you wear for no other reason than because you want to; which has nothing to do with completely unwanted attention from any stranger who imagines that you got all dressed up because you want their attention.

Yeah.

No.

Taking the time to catch part 3 of the 4 part Hunger Games Trilogy with this child of yours because that is what the two of you do together after the husbands and kids are asleep.

Running this for the third holiday season because otherwise you might just murder someone…or at least given them a really big hug with your hands around their neck because it is the holidays and because you like to eat and to drink because it is the holidays and because you like to run…a lot.

Moments of relaxation and the cat who makes you sit still and enjoy them. I plan to do just that today after I run a 10K and get Thing 1 and Thing 2 into the oven.

Happy Thanksgiving y’all!