damned if they do, damned if they don’t


So there I was, sitting in the outpatient registration waiting room of a local hospital with Hazel Faye.

Don’t ask. It was no big deal. Really. But yes, there Hazel and I were sitting in the waiting room with the Fox News Network blaring shrilly as it does in the waiting room of outpatient registration of our local hospital. I’m not sure why it must be Fox News, but it is.. Maybe because we are quite possibly in the fifth circle of Hell sitting in an outpatient waiting room.

Trust me, the last thing a five year old wants to do while waiting endlessly in a boring waiting room is to listen to some shrill pundit kvetch and moan and tear at their clothes worrying about why the President would appear with Zach Galifnianakis on Between Two Ferns. She also doesn’t find other people in the waiting room shouting at the tv entertaining at all. She’s five. All this is boring; especially sitting in a waiting room.

See?

BORING!

Don’t worry. I’ve got this.

Frozen on Mima’s iPad! You are welcome everyone waiting endlessly in the outpatient waiting room! Hazel is happy. Hazel is entertained. Hazel is sitting still. Hazel is occupied. And save for her quietly singing “Let It Go” (with perfect pitch and sounding great), she is not bothering anyone.

You.

Are.

Welcome.

Except the three older people sitting in the corner aren’t so sure.

Is that a game or something?“, a little old lady shouts out at Hazel.

Hazel looks up briefly and answers back, politely, “No, it’s an iPad.

The little old lady clucks her tongue and looks to her two companions, “Kids! They just can’t do anything but stare at some screen.

“They’re spoiled. Parents can’t be bothered so they give them cellphones and smart computers and games and those ‘Pads’ and tvs.

Yup, they’re spoiled!“:

Parents just don’t care.

The three of them nod together as they look up at Hazel then at me glaring.

Oh for crying out loud!

The first old lady nods in my direction, “How lucky she is her mother can buy her such an expensive thing like an iPad.

Hazel looks up again, rolls her eyes and says matter of factly, “I don’t have an iPad. This is my Mima’s.

I put my arm protectively around Hazel and say out loud, to no one in particular, “Well I guess a kid like you is darned if you do and darned if you don’t.

And Hazel answers back, “Yup!

For the record, I did say darn.

have Magicstick will travel


I offer no apology when I point out that we are that family where everyone has a smartphone, iPod, Ninetendo3DS, Kindle or iPad in hand. The last time we went out to dinner as a family (Abby’s birthday), my darling husband suggested that the next time we dine out together as a family whomever is the first to check their phone should pay the bill. He said this while he was scrolling through his Facebook news feed. So yes, I offer no apology because we resemble pretty much every family with teens, young adults and parents firmly connected to their phones.

Of course the worst thing ever is when we are traveling be it over the mountains and through the valleys to grandmother’s house we go, or to a dance competition or a concert or to Children’s Hospital’s Endocrinology Clinic, or work, or whatever other adventure we might be on is when one of us (or all of us) has a low battery.

The horror of it all!

Truly.

It has happened.

There is only one car charger and it might be awhile before we can find an outlet.

Definitely a problem.

Potentially a tragedy.

Which is why I gladly agreed to accept and review Powerocks Magicstick.This little Magicstick is a compact, convenient and lightweight mobile charger that easily fits in the palm of your hand. When fully charged the 2800mAh Magicstick promises to be capable of 2 full charges for most smartphones. It is compatible with seven different kind of devices including iPhone, mobile phone, mp3 player, smartphone, e-reader, gps and portable gaming devices.

Yeah, that pretty much covers this circus act of mine and our electronics.

We received our Magicstick Christmas Eve so of course we put it to the test heading to Santa Cruz for Christmas with Grandmom, Aunt Toni and Uncle Jesse. Fully charged, the Magicstick indeed came in handy charging my phone up from 20% to 100% and Zoë’s phone to about 70% from 30%. It took awhile but a charged iPhone is better than one with no battery life. Especially since the rest of the family circus was forced to take turns using the car charger on the long ride home back to the Big Top that night. The Magicstick is indeed a handy little charger to keep in your purse, briefcase, backpack or even your back pocket. The important thing to remember is to make sure that it is fully charged.

This is a review of the Powerocks Magicstick. I received no compensation other than the Magicstick itself which is being put to good use here under the Big Top. For more information about the Magicstick and other Powerocks products checkout their website here.

overheard under the Big Top #419


Daniel: I think I will FaceTime with Zoë.

And so he did. As you can see, she is looking (and feeling) so much better after her I’m-going-to-stress-and-worry-the-shit-out-of-my-mom-and-try-to-kill-my-guardian-angel-in-the-process mishap. She is so lucky she lives down in LA where I can’t my hands on her. Just saying.

But it was good to see her smiling face and hear both Daniel and her laugh. Happy, happy music that makes my heart smile, especially after the messed up, exhausting week of nothing but crazy messed up-ness we all have endured. It was good to listen to the laughter of your children.

Want me to show you my butt?”

Wait!

What?

No!

You may NOT show your sister your butt on FaceTime!

Add that to the things-my-mother-never-told-me-I-would-have-to-say-as-a-mother-someday. Then again, she never really told me much of anything about being a mother.

Oh well.

Thankfully, no butts were exposed on FaceTime. But there was more laughter and secrets shared and the discovery that it is the same time in Los Angeles as it is in Manteca.

Who knew?

“You press ‘End’.”

No, you press ‘End’.”

“No! You!”

More laughter and finally they said goodbye and ended their FaceTime.

I’m not sure who pressed “End” first.

play it again: certified


It was that time of year again for me. Time to get my Basic Life Support re-certification on again…and have the resuscitation mannikin talk dirty to me. Even better is this year the infant mannikin now talks dirty to me too. 

Thankfully I saved both mannikins and I am re-certified to perform CPR for the next two years.

You’re welcome!

originally posted May 17, 2011

Certified.

Again

For the last 24 years, every two years, I am re-certified to provide Basic Life Support as a Healthcare Provider. So yes, I still know how to save a life.

You’re welcome!

Would you believe that I have never used the CPR skills that I have learned and re-learned? True. I guess I’m too busy catching sick and tiny babies and saving their lives with my NRP skills, which must also be tested and renewed every two years as well. But if I had to perfom CPR I could…and I have the certification to prove it.

This year’s re-certification was different than it has been the last twelve times I have done it. This time around I was proctored by the manikin. A little awkward…a little weird…a lot distracting. I mean here I am trying to count chest compressions out loud because we’re supposed to and the manikin’s computer generated voice is providing feedback at the same time.

“Dude, I’m trying to count!”, I think to myself.

But the manikin continues to talk to me.

“Faster!”

“Deeper!”

“Not so deep!”

“Slower!”

“That’s good! Very good!”

“You’re doing a great job!”

Any moment, I swear I expected the manikin to scream with orgasmic pleasure…or perhaps ask me if it was good for me too as he lit up a cigarette…which is probably why he needed CPR in the first place.