family history

More than usual, my darling husband and I have had conversations with Daniel about adoption not unlike that conversation this past January. Some of it can be attributed to natural curiosity about who he is and where did he come from that comes with growing up and entering…



But given the conversations about real parents and real sisters…as opposed to the fake parents and fake sisters…I am thinking Daniel is having to endure the shiny, happy stupid that is some people’s perception of what adoption is all about. No, not his peers. It’s the shiny, happy and stupid that is their parents and other adults who influence their thinking.

Thank you shiny, happy people!

You’re welcome for the ear worm, too.

Don’t worry. Daniel is assured of the fact that I am really his mother, Bill is really his father and Hollie, Zoë, Abby, and Jodie are really his real sisters…in spite of the fact that he is adopted and in spite of what shiny, happy, stupid comes out of people’s mouths when they speak of adoption.

Which brings us to Multi-Cultural Week at Daniel’s school this week and what would he like to do for his family culture project. We could talk about Russia and all the things we learned about his biological ethnic origins thanks to Winter Games being held in Sochi, Russia this year.

“Why can’t I talk about my REAL family?”, he asks.

Truth be told, mom, his real mom, is far more interested in his biological cultural and ethnic roots than he is right now. So we begin to discuss the ethnic and cultural history of his real family. Daniel decides that he wants to talk about the origin of the Scarborough name and the Scarborough Castle because it’s kind of cool to have a real castle in your family’s history even if it isn’t really our castle.



with love to the people we practice on

So apparently today is Siblings Day.

Yes, I know some of you are rolling your eyes, shaking your head and muttering under your breath…as you some of you sometimes do over things like this that you might find silly.


The day was created by Claudia Evart, who lost both of her siblings earlier on in life. She chose the date to honor her late sister, Lisette. After losing her two siblings to separate accidents early in life, Claudia realized the importance of remembering our siblings, both living and no longer with us. She has dedicated herself to ensuring the bond of brother and sister is forever recognized as the special gift it is.

Like many, I have these pictures of my brother and sister, who are both gone, but remain with me daily, not just in these pictures, but in my daily thoughts and in my heart. I lost both of them in tragic accidents, making me understand the everlasting bond we have with our siblings.

Yes, I am sentimental, and sometimes very emotional when I remember my late brother, Randy and think of where the consequences of life, our choices and others’ choices brought Randy, Billy, Valerie and me.


So many memories…good, bad, ugly and even WTF parents?! But they are/were ours and as Randy once told me, they are the one thing that we share and share only with each other. No one will ever get any of it and that is okay. Memories like that romper Billy is wearing…that haircut of mine which would be in the WTF parents? column. But ultimately the good is what I think of looking at this picture and other pictures of the four of us. Anything else would likely have destroyed me as it crushed my younger brothers and sister. And so I focus on the magic we created together, the four of us and I give thanks.

Then I celebrate some more because, yes, I have more siblngs!

Sisters…so awesome are they! So much younger than me, so much more smarter than me, more amazing than me and even taller than me now. Our memories are different, still they are good and always make me smile. I’m pretty lucky to have you, Angela and Elana both, as sisters.

But not to be left out, my own clowns began to share today celebrating their siblings.

Nobody tell those kids of mine that this is a dream come true especially when I recall the knock-down-drag-out fights that always ended up in tears, blood drawn and a broken nose or two in the past and maybe even last month.

Honestly, kids!

Zoë shared

And because only siblings are great in that way, Hollie declared this to be probably the worst picture to share.

Oh kids!

So I offer perhaps a better picture.

I have more…lots more…Hollie found some.

Oh the secrets, promises, laughter and tears these four have shared…and the fighting…with blood and a broken nose too that these sisters have shared!

Hollie shared: “Hey Daniel, thanks for being our brother. You kind of didn’t have choice in the matter (does any sibling ever have a choice, I wonder?). But you are literally the best thing to happen to this family. You’re crazy, and awesome, and weird in the best way. You’re brilliant and inquisitive, and so much like the four of us. You’re going to drive mom and dad crazy when you’re a teen (next year, OMG!). You were meant for us. And I love you so much. Happy Sibling Day!”

My heart just exploded with glitter and rainbows and unicorns.

Siblings are the people we practice on, the people who teach us about fairness and cooperation and kindness and caring, quite often the hard way. – Pamela Dugdale





Oh to be happy, free and lonely at the same time; because it’s miserable and magical especially when you can forget about the deadlines.

A Taylor Swift fan she is absolutely not; but my darling daughter, Zoë Elizabeth, is most definitely feeling 22 today because today that is exactly what she is…she’s 22.

Happy birthday my darling girl!

just like her mama…and not at all

Today two of my daughters demonstrated how they can be just like me or not anything at all like me.

One absolutely, positively, confidently crushed her audition for AMDA. I wasn’t in the room as she danced and was interviewed; but I did literally gasp out loud causing heads to turn when I walked into the hotel mezzanine (where people waiting to be called to audition were waiting…and their parents and grandparents were hovering) as I heard the music to her audition piece because OH MY GAWD, SHE’S AUDITIONING RIGHT NOW!!! When she came out of the room I knew she owned that audition. She really has the worst poker face.

We find out in 2-4 weeks.

Stay tuned…

And another darling daughter of mine, with no warning CUT OFF ALL OF HER HAIR!!!

Her boyfriend and her family were in absolute shock because OH MY GAWD, HER HAIR, HER GORGEOUS, GLORIOUS CURLY HAIR IS ALL GONE!!!!

Yeah, it’s only hair, it will grow back and will likely be just as glorious as it was before she shaved it all off.

I know that too well from personal experience…the scalping of long, luscious locks with no warning whatsoever to the man who loves you.

And now you know who got it from her mama…and who did not.

play it again: some of the most talented nurses in Modesto…

I can’t say it enough, I seriously have the best job in the world where I get to take take of the tiniest, but mightiest human beings ever. I also get to work with some of the best people.

Originally published March 11, 2013

Some of the most talented nurses in Modesto…

Work with me!

Not a shift goes by at my workplace where I am not in awe of something that one of my co-workers can do.We save tiny human beings all day and all night long…and we come up with great ideas and plans to decrease our CABSI rate to ZERO for days and days and weeks and weeks and months and months and now years…we rock cross-fit and running, theater and music, photography and every crafty, creative hobby under the sun…and we, well, one of us can rebuild and save a twenty-one year old beloved stuffed toy from certain destruction.

Squishy doesn’t realize just how lucky she is. Some mighty skilled hands saved her ducky-ass…literally! Sure it took some time, but this was delicate work that needed to be done…done by a very busy full-time working nurse who is also busy chasing after an adorable one year old baby boy.

She is one lucky duck!

Okay Squshy, enough with the duck-faced poses. You look ridiculous.

Yeah, even for a duck!

Thank you my dear Lisa for your time and your talent and your heart. Squishy is one lucky duck because of you but I am even luckier to count you as one of my co-workers.