the big top trifecta

Thirty four years ago today…

…we both had big hair. I had the tiniest waist and yet I thought I was fat in that Gunne Sax dress. Oh, and we got married. A good thing because a few years later, Hollie made us parents; which meant on occasion our wedding anniversary and Mother’s Day would be on the same day. Then twenty-one years ago today…

…this child of ours crashed our anniversary. Naturally it would follow that on occasion May 14 would be our wedding anniversary, Mother’s Day and our Jodie’s birthday (in that order here under The Big Top, of course). Three times since 1996 to be exact.

Weird that we are all not together; I mean what young adult turning 21 wouldn’t want to celebrate it with her Dad and Mom on their 34th wedding anniversary and on Mother’s Day? Oh well. There is always May 14 2023; our next May 14 Trifecta.

to the moon and back

I really didn’t want to be one of those people sharing all the romance and flowers and love notes and gifts that are Valentine’s Day. I really didn’t. My darling husband and I are basically old married people…he looks like a grumpy Get Off My Lawn old man and every waking and most sleeping hours I am now painfully aware of my swollen, achy, arthritic joints…so we basically made no plans for Valentine’s Day. It’s for the young ones we agreed.

Still my darling husband DID buy new dishes the week before. Understand that we have had the same dishes since we were potty training adult members of this circus act. We now have dinnerware for GROWN UPS; dinnerware that I noticed one time months prior as really good looking dinnerware. Y’all can have your flowers and cards and box of chocolates and wine…okay, I would like the wine too…but my darling husband and I don’t need One Day to express our love. We have every day together and five children and two grandchildren and brand new dishes. So, for Valentine’s Day, which was Tuesday, I worked so that the young ones could have the night off…and go out to dinner on a Tuesday. My darling husband and I have the weekend off when our favorite restaurant won’t be crowded at all. Oh, and we have new dishes too!

Love is in the air here under The Big Top!

Coming home, early Tuesday morning, the last thing I expected was this.

Sometimes, I think about the day we met. I think about how I was in the right place at the right time to see your face, and how you smiled a smile that told me you were someone amazing. Ever since the day we met, you’ve made me realize that true love has perfect timing.

Yeah.

New dishes, beautiful flowers and the best love note ever! There is a very good reason why I call him my darling husband.

Yeah.

I love him too, to the moon and back.

Of course I shared these beautiful flowers all over social media, as young lovers, old married people and all those other people do on Valentine’s Day.

 

 

temperature control

Well, good night honey. He walks over to the bedroom window to close it shut.

Wait! 

What?

You’re not really going to close that are you?

Do you know how cold it was this morning?

No.

Do you care?

No.

I woke up shivering. My teeth were chattering.

Pats the bed. That’s what the blankets are for.

Remember when you were the one who was always cold?

Good times!

Menopause sucks.

You have no idea…Can you turn the fan on please?

and after six years

And now six years later, these two seem to remain just as impossibly, perfectly meant to be as the day they pledged to be together to infinity and beyond.

Infinity and the beyond that is making a life and a home together for the two of them and their impossibly, perfectly, wonderful daughters. It’s not all smoke and mirrors y’all. These two have worked hard together and we can’t help but be proud of all the adventures to infinity and beyond that they have made. They have grown up together coming through many adventures…some wonderful and some that would knock the wind out of you. Still they live, love and thrive.

Yeah, we’re also a little jealous of how perfectly gorgeous they continue to be.

Happy anniversary Hollie and Ben!

from PokemonGo to the Holocaust to living in tents

When it comes to raising our children, we all have goals along with our wishes and hopes and dreams for our children. Mine is very much influenced by my upbringing and past, as well as current relationships with some family members.

To my family who follows my blog, yes, this part might be about you…then again, you might be wrong in assuming so.

As a mother, one of the biggest things I wanted to nurture in my five was to think for themselves…forge their own opinions…express those thoughts and opinions. I wanted them all to know that their thoughts are their own and are definitely okay, in fact, they are perfect because they are theirs. I also wanted them to understand that they are well within their right as a thinking person to express what they are thinking…even if it disagreed with someone else’s…even if it was Mom or Dad’s. Especially if they disagreed with Mom or Dad. Of course there was the proviso that they must be respectful and kind because it’s Mom or Dad, or their friends, or their teachers, or any other thinking human being because I was also trying to instill in them the importance of, well, The Golden Rule. Be kind. Be respectful. Anyone who truly knows me would likely understand why this was important for me to have for my children. Yes, yes, yes, this has made my parenting adventure rather challenging because my five are fierce and very much strong-willed; kind of like their Mom and Dad.

Yes, Hollie, we were cursed as children too.

But, in spite of the years of challenges, I like that my five are fierce and I like that they can think for themselves and can and do, almost all the time, express their thoughts and their opinions.

In the news recently was the request for people to stop playing PokemonGo in The Holocaust Museum. “Playing the game is not appropriate in the museum, which is a memorial to the victims of Nazism,” Andrew Hollinger, the museum’s communications director, told The Post. “We are trying to find out if we can get the museum excluded from the game.”

What’s The Holocaust, Mom?

And so began a conversation with my 14 year old about what The Holocaust is and what happened to more than 6 million people just because of their religion or ethnicity or sexual orientation at that time and he interrupts me drawing a comparison to a certain candidate. His thoughts. His thoughts based on what he sees and hears and reads all around him. His thoughts expressed. I shared his thoughts (no names mentioned) with friends and family on Facebook just like that because, wow, that. My son’s thoughts. Thus began commentary and conversation, as we often do on Facebook and other social media platforms; which, in my opinion, is more than okay. Agree, disagree, more than okay. Just be kind…on my personal space because we absolutely, positively can agree to disagree on pretty much anything as long as we are at the very least respectful. Don’t believe me? Ask my darling husband. Well, except that he believes Pepsi to be a superior soft drink over Coke. Oh my darling husband!

Take note here, don’t blast my Facebook wall telling me Coke is not better because it is. Okay, fine, you can. Just be kind. I might not agree with you but that doesn’t mean that I have been decieved or tooled by the media because, I promise you, I am absolutely smarter than that…so are my Fierce Five. We don’t have to agree. We both can look at one another’s opinions on just about anything and think to ourself, what the actual fuck?…I do it literally ALL THE TIME looking at some postings of some family and friends on Facebook and then I move on because BABIES! KITTENS! AMAZING VACATION PHOTOS! FUNNY VIDEOS! And I move on because we don’t HAVE to feel the same way about current events or who we believe will make America great again. And yes, this is a beautiful thing for me and for the beauty of America where we can still think freely!...Isn’t that ironic?