lane changes and birthdays

You know that funny knobby thing on the left hand side of the steering wheel in your car? Do you know what it is? Do you know what’s very special purpose is? Well, allow me to enlighten you.


It’s a way to let people know that you are going to turn left or right.



Use it!!!

Friday afternoon commuting from the Bay Area to the Central Valley is basically nothing less than a cluster fuck. Basically. Coming home my darling husband was in an accident. I might have to give thanks for the slow crawl down from the Altamont into Mountain House because when a driver to the right of him decided to suddenly move to the left without signaling, he was not moving too fast. But he was traveling fast enough to not be able to get out of the way in time and…his hand, YES, HIS HAND hit the driver’s side mirror of the car. He broke her mirror, minor damage was sustained to his bike and one of his fingers was injured. Information was exchanged. The driver gave first aid with a pressure dressing applied to his hand, which was bleeding quite a bit. Oh, and it was her birthday. Happy birthday to her, right?!

Darling husband, being darling husband,got back on the bike and rode 25 more miles home.

Honey, I need you to look at something for me…spoken oh so casually as he showed me his left hand wrapped in a giant wad of paper towels tied up around his hand with a latex glove.

What in the world??!!…

I cut away the glove and begin to unwind the towels to see active bleeding and a very swollen, black and blue pinky finger.

Do you think I should get it checked out?

Off to the ER we went. For those keeping score, this is the third trip to the ER for this family in 2016. Seriously, 2016 is just all around not working.

X-rays, exam and 5 stitches later, we are home and my darling husband right now is oh so elegant sipping his ice cold beverage.

Pinky up y’all.

It could have been bad, bad, bad, bad. But it wasn’t. My darling husband is well aware of that as he practically apologizes to me reminding me just how careful he is on his bike on the road. For now, I will just be thankful and focus on this moment 24 hours later.

Bill turned 53 this week and today our family circus gathered together and celebrated.

That funny, knobby thingy on the left hand side your car’s steering wheel? Use it!

from PokemonGo to the Holocaust to living in tents

When it comes to raising our children, we all have goals along with our wishes and hopes and dreams for our children. Mine is very much influenced by my upbringing and past, as well as current relationships with some family members.

To my family who follows my blog, yes, this part might be about you…then again, you might be wrong in assuming so.

As a mother, one of the biggest things I wanted to nurture in my five was to think for themselves…forge their own opinions…express those thoughts and opinions. I wanted them all to know that their thoughts are their own and are definitely okay, in fact, they are perfect because they are theirs. I also wanted them to understand that they are well within their right as a thinking person to express what they are thinking…even if it disagreed with someone else’s…even if it was Mom or Dad’s. Especially if they disagreed with Mom or Dad. Of course there was the proviso that they must be respectful and kind because it’s Mom or Dad, or their friends, or their teachers, or any other thinking human being because I was also trying to instill in them the importance of, well, The Golden Rule. Be kind. Be respectful. Anyone who truly knows me would likely understand why this was important for me to have for my children. Yes, yes, yes, this has made my parenting adventure rather challenging because my five are fierce and very much strong-willed; kind of like their Mom and Dad.

Yes, Hollie, we were cursed as children too.

But, in spite of the years of challenges, I like that my five are fierce and I like that they can think for themselves and can and do, almost all the time, express their thoughts and their opinions.

In the news recently was the request for people to stop playing PokemonGo in The Holocaust Museum. “Playing the game is not appropriate in the museum, which is a memorial to the victims of Nazism,” Andrew Hollinger, the museum’s communications director, told The Post. “We are trying to find out if we can get the museum excluded from the game.”

What’s The Holocaust, Mom?

And so began a conversation with my 14 year old about what The Holocaust is and what happened to more than 6 million people just because of their religion or ethnicity or sexual orientation at that time and he interrupts me drawing a comparison to a certain candidate. His thoughts. His thoughts based on what he sees and hears and reads all around him. His thoughts expressed. I shared his thoughts (no names mentioned) with friends and family on Facebook just like that because, wow, that. My son’s thoughts. Thus began commentary and conversation, as we often do on Facebook and other social media platforms; which, in my opinion, is more than okay. Agree, disagree, more than okay. Just be kind…on my personal space because we absolutely, positively can agree to disagree on pretty much anything as long as we are at the very least respectful. Don’t believe me? Ask my darling husband. Well, except that he believes Pepsi to be a superior soft drink over Coke. Oh my darling husband!

Take note here, don’t blast my Facebook wall telling me Coke is not better because it is. Okay, fine, you can. Just be kind. I might not agree with you but that doesn’t mean that I have been decieved or tooled by the media because, I promise you, I am absolutely smarter than that…so are my Fierce Five. We don’t have to agree. We both can look at one another’s opinions on just about anything and think to ourself, what the actual fuck?…I do it literally ALL THE TIME looking at some postings of some family and friends on Facebook and then I move on because BABIES! KITTENS! AMAZING VACATION PHOTOS! FUNNY VIDEOS! And I move on because we don’t HAVE to feel the same way about current events or who we believe will make America great again. And yes, this is a beautiful thing for me and for the beauty of America where we can still think freely!...Isn’t that ironic?

in the neighborhood and beyond

Doesn’t it seem like just last week we were shocked, sad, mad and talking about another horrible act of foreign or domestic terror? Oh yeah. We were just talking about such an abominable thing.

Yes, all the big heavy sighs now; and again with all the hashtags of #prayforFrance, #prayforNice, #BlueLivesMatter, #BlackLivesMatter, #AllLivesMatter along with our thoughts and prayers. Helpless we feel and for most of us this is all we feel like we can do. Well, except for discussing it all on social media.

Thanks to local farmer, comedian, writer, self-proclaimed 40-year old entitled boob, Chris Teicheira, I signed on to a local neighborhood watch page on Facebook…for keeping Manteca safe…and for the lookie-loo, popcorn snacking entertainment. Uh, thanks, Chris? Actually there is some good that comes from this group on occasion…when there isn’t bitching and moaning about the right to or not to shoot off all the illegal fireworks all the time, or all problems in Manteca are because of the homeless, and the entitled boobery, as Chris so aptly described. Under the guise of social media anonymity, which is not anonymous at all y’all, a lot of neighbors in my Family City are basically looking like entitled boobs.

Another heavy sigh.

In the wake of so much going on in the news, a local resident felt lead to initiate a peaceful call to action; which was well within her right under the First Amendment of our Constitution. She planned all in the right way and it reportedly went off without a hitch. Of course the discussion last night and throughout today on the Family City neighborhood watch page focused much on the Black Lives Matter peaceful march throughout our city. So much ugly discussion y’all. I see you. I see you all.

Perhaps after the deaths of police officers in Baton Rouge yesterday during yet another act of terror at the hand of yet another lone, angry asshole, it might not have been the right time for such a peaceful protest. Then again, when would be the right time, really? From my armchair overnight at work, it seemed that it was a peaceful assembly focused on the BLM movement but also very sensitive to the murders of police officers just doing their job protecting and serving their community. It was a respectful gathering of more than 50 people of all colors and ethnicities making a quiet statement.

I see nothing wrong here.

Well, except for this reality.

Another day…

We all need to do better. We all need to be kinder. We all need to be all of this to all.

We don’t need inflammatory rhetoric. We don’t need careless accusations thrown around to score political points or to advance an agenda…Only we can prove, through words and through deeds, that we will not be divided, and we’re going to have to keep on doing it again and again and again. That’s how this country gets united…Around the clock news cycles and social media sometimes amplify these divisions, That is why it is so important that everyone: regardless of race or political party or profession, regardless of what organizations you’re a part of, everyone right now focus on words and actions that can unite this country rather than divide it further.

Barack Obama

Cleveland, Philadelphia, Manteca, America, the World…respect, kindness for all…please.

I will not look at my 401k, I will not look at my 401k…

So Brexit happened.

And the Prime Minister resigned and the Pound went into free fall and global markets dove sharply Friday as well and…I resist the overwhelming urge to check on my retirement account telling myself all the positive things. It’s is a mostly conservative fund based on the sage advice of my late father in law. My eggs in that fund are not all in one basket so to speak. We all should wait a little for the dust to settle and, hopefully…

I will not look at my 401K, I will not look at my 401K…

So much of this, the players, the rhetoric…I guess we aren’t the only ones jelled in crazy politics. Of course we aren’t.

But oh my god, how much more crazy can it get?

Well, this guy could get elected.

Shaking my head, I mutter to myself to not look at my 401K. Just don’t. Look somewhere else.

And I literally laughed until I cried because of all the glorious, perfect adjectives. All of them! People, we got to vote come November. We ALL must vote come November or someone who proves over and over again that he is manifestly unprepared for the White House, just might end up there.

Better be ill spoken of by one before all than by all before one. ~ Scottish Proverb

I’m tired

I worked the last couple nights; so one would assume that I am tired right about now. I am. I am tired; but not because of Vampira night shift nurse problems that is resetting my body clock back to daytime life.


I’m tired because so many other reasons.

  • I’m tired of the bullshit that is life right now where my kids must keep tucked into the back of their minds that they aren’t really safe in places like their school campuses or movie theaters or churches or shopping malls or night clubs.
  • I’m tired that they must accept the reality that mass shootings happen and, eventually, it will be the city where they live’s turn…because apparently we now take turns with this.
  • I’m tired of thoughts and prayers being our call to action every. damn. time. Thoughts and prayers are good. The victims of these horrific acts of violence do need our thoughts and prayers but so much more than thoughts and prayers are needed. After our pauses for moments of silence, we need to take action. Shout it out if we have to. No, we are not being disrespectful of the dead and their mourning loved ones. What is disrespectful is to stop and pray, say amen, shake our heads over the “godless world we live in” and move on to the next task at hand like “what’s for lunch?” We need to do much more than pray.
  • I’m tired of people’s need to be right. One can no longer agree to disagree. Opinions and feelings over something like a call to action beyond thoughts and prayers for victims of mass shootings is met with broad strokes that assume much too much of a person’s values, thought processes and oh so sheltered life. To argue back is met with apples and oranges arguments or taunts and jeers. A difference of opinion is yesterday’s black. Conform! We all must conform. I don’t want to conform. “Democracy in a nation of 300 million can be noisy and messy and complicated. We have our own opinions. Each of us has deeply held beliefs. And when we go through tough times, when we make big decisions as a country, it necessarily stirs passions, stirs up controversy.That won’t change…and it shouldn’t These arguments we have are a mark of our liberty. We can never forget that as we speak people in distant nations are risking their lives right now just for a chance to argue about the issues that matter, the chance to cast their ballots.”
    We don’t have to agree and that’s fundamentally okay as we were created to be unique individuals. But hurray for noise, the mess and the complications that has been US for 240 years. At least that’s how I see it!” ~ President Barack Obama
  • In the words of the super amazing Amy “Just a reminder, guys, that as the gun debate heats up, most of us gals (especially the ones from the south and west) don’t need you to mansplain weaponry to us.
    So if your first comment when jumping into a debate is to school us little ol’ prissies on the differences between types of guns, or on how magazines or ammo works, maybe just sit back, take a sip of your scotch, and zip it for a bit. We’ll work it out without you in due time, so thanks but no thanks.”
    Guys, I promise you that just because I have a problem with this god-given right to arms ourselves with as much mass killing weaponry that we should be able to purchase  as humanly possible because it is the blessed Second Amendment Right y’all, I am NOT here to take away all of your guns! I might lean a little to the pacifist side but it is not because I have never seen a gun or touched a gun or fired a gun or cleaned a gun. You dumb fool, you don’t need to pat me on the head and explain these things to me so that I will understand that guns don’t kill people…people kill, fertilizer bombs kill, cars kill, box cutters kill, knives kill, alligators kill…and I bet Build-A-Bear teddy bears can kill too because smothering.
    Don’t explain this to me. I’m tired of it!
  • And speaking of alligators, I’m tired of the sanctimommies and daddies and people who have never had children sitting back sipping their green tea whilst judging others on what has to be the worst days of their lives ever.
    Just don’t.
    I know it is so much more easy to do it because, hurray interwebs and all the social media. But don’t.
    Do you know how much of an asshole you come off as when you do it? Trust me, while trying to survive a parent’s worst nightmare, a parent is doing a good enough job of eviscerating theirselves all on their very own, thank you very much.

So yeah, I’m tired. Aren’t you glad that you asked how am I right now? Yeah, I’m tired.